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RELIEF STRESS TO HELP END BACK PAIN: INDEPENDENCE
Loss of Independence
Chronic back pain often leads to a loss of independence in your life. The degree of this loss varies with the frequency of pain, the intensity of pain, and your personality. We all have different tolerance levels and methods of handling our problems. If you have always relied on other people, the entrance of chronic back pain into your life has probably increased your level of dependence. You may even have found this very comfortable. But your family may be feeling overwhelmed by your needs.
On the other hand, you may have prided yourself on never having to rely on others. If so, having to give up some of this self-sufficiency has probably destroyed your self-image. You may even find yourself going without some necessities just because you will not ask someone else to help.
Coping Strategies for Loss of Independence
If you are experiencing a loss of independence, taking control of your abilities – even with chronic back pain – can help you regain some independence and self-esteem. Try these strategies:
1. Think about the activities you have stopped. Determine which ones are physically impossible, and which ones you are avoiding because of pain.
2. If you are doing everything you are physically capable of doing, don’t feel guilty about asking for assistance with the things you absolutely cannot do.
3. Each week, try to do something new that you had been asking others to do for you.
4. If you have the financial means, hire the services you need instead of relying on family members. Your family may be very willing to help, but, over time, this dependency can lead them – and you – to feel some resentment.
5. Never let your family think you equate their love with the amount of help they give.
6. Never use guilt to make your family feel that they are not doing enough to help you.
7. Remember that the more you can do for yourself, the better you will feel about yourself.
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